Some Indian moms are the biggest misogynists I have come across. This is a very intrepid remark, but let me explain why I make it.
Girls are punished severely for the things they very conveniently ignore if their sons do it because ‘boys will be boys.’ From a very young age, girls are taught to be good wives, moms as if their worth depends on how good they are at that role. They don’t teach their sons the most basic things, which is why they grow up to be the men who are dependent on their wives for most rudimentary things. How many times have you been shushed for giving your opinions? I know myriad incidents.
Girls are told not to be too ‘opinionated’ or ‘over-smart’ as it would risk their chances of getting married. This is where the men learn to not take our opinions seriously. Do not ignore your son’s casual sexism or toxic masculinity saying ‘boys will be boys’ this makes them disrespect women and get away with it. Girls are pushed into the kitchens to work whereas boys get a glass of water in their hands in many families. Our validity depends on how good we are at household chores. We are forced to mature faster than men, sometimes held accountable for their immaturity, too. The entire onus is on us to educate them and it is exhausting. Daughters are raised to be the caregivers and stigmatized for refusing to be the caregivers for men that are unwilling to help equally. Hold your sons accountable for their actions so that they don’t grow up to be at the receiving end of ‘men are trash.’
