I have been struggling with this for the past nine years and have to voice it out. There were many days where it made me wonder, “why was I even born a woman?”
Some may agree to this, and some may disagree, but this is something I feel that I have to voice out. The thoughts have been lurking within me for years, and it just irks me. Today, I just broke down in tears. I just needed to voice it out.
Question: WHY DO MOST SOUTH ASIAN PARENTS FREAK OUT AND MAKE IT A BIG ISSUE WHEN THEY SEE A MENSTRUAL PAD OR/AND BECOMES EXTRA CAUTIOUS DURING THE MENSTRUATION MONTH?
I get it. It’s not a pleasant sight to see a pad just lying there, but it’s wrapped in paper and plastic. How does it even affect humans or/and the environment? There is global warming, people throw trash everywhere, there are still water pollution and air pollution, and there are oil leakages almost everywhere in the sea now. Of all things to be worried about in this world, why do they choose this? I don’t get it. Does it even affect mother nature?
We, women, tend to forget too. We forget to throw the pad away and perhaps, take our time to throw it away [the reason why we wrap it in a paper and plastic]. Yet, when that happens accidentally, they are quick to label it as dirty and bad vibes during that time of the month. It’s not on purpose. They make it seem like being a woman is a curse, or we’re some kind of an omen every month.
I feel that this whole “oh it’s dirty,” “oh it’s not good for the house,” “oh the blood is bad,” “oh it brings bad luck if someone sees it,” “Oh you can’t go into the prayer room to pray.” These are utterly ridiculous. This whole concept in Hinduism wasn’t there in the first place. How did this come about? What happened during the days before pads were even made?
Question: IF I CAN’T GO INTO THE PRAYER ROOM OR TEMPLE? WASN’T HE THE ONE THAT MADE ME THIS WAY? BUT I’M TOO DIRTY DURING MENSTRUATION TO GO IN TO PRAY?
We women were born this way, and we didn’t ask for it. Nobody can justify or argue this fact.
It’s natural for us to bleed, and it’s not dirty. We are not dirty. I’m the type to emphasize hygiene and cleanliness, but I strongly don’t support the fact that we, women, should be treated like we have some kind of disease. It’s not fair.
In this generation, parents should come to this understanding that we also have our days of exhaustion and tiredness. We tend to forget or delay the time to throw it away. It’s not on purpose. Of all people, mothers are supposed to be understanding.
Stop being stuck on the stigma around women bleeding, their pads, or menstruation as a whole.
Support your daughters, sisters, friends, girlfriend, wife. Support them instead of putting them down. Stop being angry at them. Don’t nag at them and make them feel disgusted by themselves. We are already emotional and in so much pain during periods. We tend to explode from these emotions. Stop adding on to it.
So what if your sons or the neighbors see it? So what? Is this out of the norm? Why don’t you teach your sons that this is normal? This is something sacred, and it’s not dirty. It hurts for us when South Asian parents act this way. You shouldn’t make us feel embarrassed about it or emphasize it negatively when it is something completely natural.
Just because we were born as women does not mean we have to behave a certain way or do things a certain way.
Stop reacting negatively.